by Angela
It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and, if you dream of meeting your heart's longing.
This is so simple for me. I ache to experience clarity of emotion so that I can: (1) be happy with who I am and what I do with my life, (2) experience deep, abiding, true love with my family, my friends and a man I can share my life with; and (3) share true, inner happiness with those I love. I dream of meeting my heart's longing every day of my life, every chance I can- just for the fun of it.
As I have said in the past. I was a shadow of my self for many years. Then one day, without warning, I threw off my shell and ventured back into the real world. In doing so, I realized that, at least in a sense, I was beginning a whole, new phase of my life. With that realization, I chose to examine who I was and what I wanted. I knew I wanted to be my highest self, the best me I could be and so I began traveling this road of self-improvement. I began to really examine my life and my emotions. It was with a little anxiety and a modicum of trepidation that I searched my heart. I knew it would mean change and that is hard for me. I knew it would mean being honest with myself about myself and my emotions. Nevertheless, I dared to enter grounds that were previously uncharted. There, I discovered my heart's true longings and the thing that makes me ache - clarity of emotion.
Emotions are strange things. They can lie to us about the world and our place in it. They can deceive us and play tricks on our mind. If we do not take the time to get in touch with them, we can lose perspective, sometimes trusting them exclusively and often to our detriment. Emotions can also be based on false reality - things that are not necessarily true (although they may be true for us). Alternatively, if we close them up or ignore them, when we open them up again, they become one big mass of contradictions and confusion.
We question them, even when they are real, because we have forgotten how to trust them and when to trust them. So clarity of emotion is a good thing. It means our emotions have been examined, considered and put into proper perspective. For me, it means I am becoming more open with them; that I consider them, that I am beginning to know how and when to trust them. Clarity of emotion allows us to seek to experience the emotions that we need in our life and then to appreciate their reality when we finally experience them. For me, that is love of family, friends and a man I choose to share my life with.
Love of family, friends and a man has become more important to me as I have matured. Everyday, when I pray, I say thank you for my family, I pray them joy, happiness, peace and the manifestation of their dream lives. I also thank God for their presence in my life and pray that we continue to grow together, that our familial bonds may be strengthened by love and kindness, gentleness and forgiveness. We have not always been close though we have always loved each other. I think it has taken time and maturity for us to appreciate all that each of us has been through and to accept each other, flawed and imperfect. I think we have all come to realize that love is the greatest gift we can give each other. I know I have! That is what comes of clarity of emotion.
That's it for this week. I will continue my thoughts on this part of The Invitation next week. In the meantime, examine your heart. What do you ache for? Are you taking steps to reach your heart's longing? Remember, this is the only life you have and this is the time to go for it Take a chance and reach for your heart's longings. The worst is to wake up and realize you have wasted days on everything but what is important to You. So... GO FOR IT!
If life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, lets all get wasted and have the time of our lives.
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